Duties to parents

Kindness to parents is mentioned as a duty of believers several times in the Quran. There are many Hadiths that encourage us to be very kind to our parents.

Obedience must be discriminating. We obey our parents only in what is right and what is calculated to please Allah. But we should be kind to them in all situations.
Almighty Allah has emphasized that kindness to parents is one of the most important qualities of believers. He says in the Qur’an:

“Thy Lord hath decreed, that ye worship none save Him, and (that ye show) kindness to parents. If one of them or both of them to attain old age with thee, say not ‘Fie’ unto them nor repulse them, but speak unto them a gracious word. (23) And lower unto them the wing of submission through mercy, and say: My Lord! Have mercy on them both as they did care for me when I was little.” (Al-Isra 17:23-24).

Allah (swt) says:
And We have enjoined on man (to be good) to his parents: in travail upon travail did his mother bear him, and in years twain was his weaning: (hear the command), “Show gratitude to Me and to thy parents: to Me is (thy final) Goal. (Luqman 31: 14)

Parents are also responsible for what they demand of their children. It is not right of a father to require his son or daughter to do something that is contrary to Islamic principles, relying on the fact that his son or daughter should obey him. Indeed, if the parents do that, they fail in their duty to help their children choose only what Islam approves. Not only so, but they forfeits his rights to be obeyed by their children.

When the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) was told by one of his female Companions that her mother, a non-believer, had come to visit her, he told her: “Be kind to your mother.”

Narrated By Abu Huraira: A man came to Allah’s Apostle and said, “O Allah’s Apostle! Who is more entitled to be treated with the best companionship by me?” The Prophet said, “your mother.” The man said. “Who is next?” The Prophet said, “your mother.” The man further said, “Who is next?” The Prophet said, “your mother.” The man asked for the fourth time, “Who is next?” The Prophet said, “Your father.”

“Allâh burdens not a person beyond his scope….” (Al-Baqarah 2:286)

Allah says:
….And there is no sin for you in the mistakes that ye make unintentionally, but what your hearts purpose (that will be a sin for you). Allah is Forgiving, Merciful”. (Al-Ahzab 33:5)

Prophet (pbuh) is reported to have said: “The reward of deeds depends upon the intentions and every person will get the reward according to what he has intended.”(Bukhari)

Obeying and honoring one’s parents is a means of entering Paradise. Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) quoted the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) as saying: “He is doomed, he is doomed, he is doomed.” Then someone said, “Who, O Messenger of Allah?” He said, “The person whose parents, one or both of them, reach old age during his lifetime but he does not enter Paradise.” (Reported by Muslim)

The Prophet said: “One of the major sins is to abuse one’s parents”. The Companions asked: “How is it possible for anyone to abuse one’s parents?” He replied: “To abuse another’s parents is tantamount to abusing one’s own parents because when you abuse other men’s parents, they would abuse yours in retaliation”.
(Muslim, Bukhari and Abu Da’ud)

Allah’s pleasure lies in the pleasure of one’s parents and His anger also lies therein” (Bukhari)

So deal with parents honorably, and do entrust them to keep your stuff.